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The No-Utensil, No-Dishes Diet

My toddler’s revolutionary diet

Kristin Rowan
2 min readAug 14, 2023
Photo by Brett Jordan: https://www.pexels.com/photo/close-up-photo-of-french-fries-in-a-red-container-7731979/

My toddler does not follow traditional nutrition advice, but somehow he still has seemingly unlimited energy, regular bowel movements, and a positive demeanor.

If you want all those things too, here is what you should be eating:

McDonald’s

Specifically a 10-piece McNuggets, a handful of fries and sometimes a cookie. For a change of pace you could eat this at the table, but usually grab a handful and walk around playing while you eat them. Sometimes eat all ten, but sometimes misplace some amongst your toys and call it good enough.

Yogurt

The kind with a pouch and a nozzle. You don’t have time for spoons.

Bananas or Banana Chips

Switch back and forth between which of these you prefer, but don’t tell anyone.

Banana Bread

Cookies

Potato Chips

Plain Ruffles for sure. Other types will be considered.

Crackers

Most kinds are acceptable. Graham crackers are the best. Cheez-its and chocolate bunny grahams are also winners.

Toaster Waffles

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Kristin Rowan
Kristin Rowan

Written by Kristin Rowan

Comedian (https://www.youtube.com/@kristinlrowan), author of Paula and Mr. Meanie Pants, single mom

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